(Prosperity - Brian S Glaser)
After searching high and low for a good financial planner and advisor, I found the perfect one on the pillow next to mine. My wife Eileen, a textile designer by day, uses her own quick wits to handle all fiscal matters big and small for our household. Pillow Talk is a close look at marriage, finance and communication.
One of the more surprising things about having my wife as my financial advisor is how thoroughly shocked a lot of people are to hear it. Even in an age where we have a female Speaker of the House, everyone assumes I handle our house's finances - even those who know how terrible I am at math.
While this sort of bias knits Eileen's brow from time to time, I've found that I can also wield it as a fantastic money-saving weapon. When salesmen, contractors, bank agents and the like assume that I'm running the fiscal show, I can throw a negotiation off balance with a line that goes like this: "My wife will kill me." It is never (well, OK...rarely) true, but the idea that I'm going to have to answer to the Little Lady can alter a negotiation in an instant.
For example, when we recently purchased a car, I was charged with making it happen. Eileen didn't particularly care what I came home with, within reason (while it would be nice if it were blue...). She was busy with something else, and I had 100% final say. So when I'd gotten the price of a new Prius down to what I could stomach, I looked the salesman in the eye and said: "My wife sent me out to get a used car, and she's going to be pissed if I come home with a new one."
The guy immediately launched into a side-discussion about how his wife can set limits on things without understanding what's involved. We connected over a common variable – our wives, supposedly - and yet, it threw the sale into doubt in a way that felt dangerously real to him, and he knocked the offer down a few hundred dollars. I bought the car. And yes, it was blue.
Just as effective is our tag-team tactic, which any of you can use in almost any situation, though it does need two people – works as well with roommates as spouses. We used the tag-team tactic when applying for a line of credit at the bank. As we started to get into the details, the bank officer directed all his questions to me, and then was thrown off-guard when Eileen stepped in with highly pointed questions about the rate and other terms. We got what we wanted just a few beats quicker than normal, and I credit it largely to the misdirection (Ms.Direction?) that came with Eileen stepping in with her hapless/helpless husband.
Obviously, this won't work in every situation (see the sidebar for the ways it can work for you)--but it's effective more often than you'd think. By making a human connection with these people, whether it’s “Dude, my wife will kill me” with a shared look or capitalizing on their erroneous assumptions regarding gender roles, we’ve saved ourselves some time and cash. And I, for one, don't feel bad for a second for taking advantage of anyone who underestimates my very estimable financial manager
